My love

In the 19th and early 20th century, Indians were brought to Malaysia as labours by the British government. Indian workers filled vacancies in lower-skilled occupations. That was when my great-grandparents came to Malaysia. Although they moved to another country from their motherland, they did not forget their roots. They brought all their beautiful Indian traditions with them.

Three generations later, we still practice most of the traditions especially our festivals such as “Deepavali”, “Pongal”, and Thaipusam and there’s a meaning for every festival. Deepavali is the festival of light. The festival symbolizes the victory of light over darkness. Besides that, we also do prayers to pay respect to our ancestor and to get their blessings. “Deepavali” was my favourite festival during my childhood because I get new clothes, good food, traditional delights and most importantly I get to meet my favourite cousins.

It was November 2007, that was a special celebration for us at our new home in Ipoh. Most of our relatives were present. We were all busy with the preparations for the prayers that we would be having on the Deepavali day for our ancestors.

My dad returned to home after fetching my grandmother and aunt. We were all excited on their arrival. Little did I know about the surprise my dad had brought for us. My dad get off the car and called my name so I rushed to the entrance. He said “look what’s in the car”. I went to open the front door of the car where my aunt was sitting and she smiled at me. I was clueless but that was only until I clear my eyes and took a look at the legroom.

It was a baby labrador retriever curled into a ball. She was a cute little girl. As someone who love puppies and dogs, I was super happy and excited, my aunt carried the puppy and passed it to me. At that moment, I felt like I was the lion king and she was my simba. My dad named her Juju. Everyone was in love with Juju. We had a great celebration that year but I was more invested in Juju than the festival itself.

Juju has become a new member in our family. She was the most cutest puppy. The little paws, the wink, chewing on my favourite sandals, barking at everything including her own reflection. The way she tilted her head when I looked at her. All my free time was spent with her. We built a great connection. I was officially the caretaker of Juju. I truly enjoyed the puppy phase even though I had to clean uncountable puddles. I enjoyed carrying her, feeding her and bringing her for walks.

She started growing up fast. Six months later, she was almost 70 pounds and I was unable to carry her. After awhile, I couldn’t even take her for walk because I cannot control her. She was a big girl, I was just a twelve-year-old kid. It was time to pick the new caretaker and it was my brother.

The time I spent with Juju slowly became lesser but our bond was still unbreakable. The year 2008 ended, I went to visit one of my aunt who lives in Johor which was very far from home. My aunt and uncle had always been lovely. The couples didn’t have a child even after many years of marriage so my parents thought it would make them happy to have me around since I was their favourite niece. They also treated me like their own child. Therefore, I love spending time with them.

One night, I received a call from my dad. The call was to ask me to come back home as quick as possible. My dad said Juju was unwell and he wanted me to take care of her. I didn’t know what was behind it. My aunt tried to book the tickets but all the tickets were sold since the New year was around the corner. We finally got our tickets to Ipoh on the 9th January 2009.

I arrived in Ipoh on the next day which was 10th January 2009 and I reached home around 12.30pm. The first thing I looked for was my Juju. My girl was nearly 100 pounds when I left but she wasn’t the same anymore. My heart shattered when I looked at my poor baby’s condition. She couldn’t even move. She was just lying down with zero energy. She had been poisoned by the neighbours. She didn’t recover even after the treatment. I sat down with her. I told her I will take care of her no matter what. She lifted her head and looked into my eyes for a few seconds and she rested her head on the floor. My parents stated that she had been Ill for a few weeks and they were hopeless seeing the treatment not working for her. They assumed she would not survive till I come home.

I went inside the house after hugging and kissing Juju. A few minutes later, at 1.15pm my brother went to feed Juju. I was watching them from the window. My brother carried Juju and he immediately put her down. He started crying. I rushed outside. Juju was dead. My furkid, my little sister, my soulmate, my friend, my love and my everything was dead. I felt like my whole world had fallen apart. I started crying and cried for years. I still cry because her love for me was the biggest and the purest love ever. She waited for me to come back while she was already on her deathbed. She fought death to see me for a few seconds. I think nothing in this world could compare to her love for me. She died four days before my birthday and every year I think about her. Some days I felt guilty for being happy without her and then I realised that my angel would only want to see me happy. My eyes is full of tears but my heart is full of gratitude. I’m grateful that we crossed paths. I’m grateful for all the moments we both shared. I’m grateful for the love she had for me. Lastly, I’m grateful for what Juju has taught me. She taught me the meaning of unconditional love. I’m grateful to have learned it from someone who doesn’t even speak a word. Juju’s language was love. She made me a better person and I’m forever grateful for that. If I could do something for her, i would give her half of my life so that we will live together again.